2021.10.16 20:58 tulpamom reminder to scrape your packaging!
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2021.10.16 20:58 Excellent-Dust9163 Fazel had a few too many last night, still green after being brought back from the dead?
2021.10.16 20:58 CaveManLenny Show me the Soul-Fax
|submitted by CaveManLenny to minipainting [link] [comments]|
2021.10.16 20:58 gamethread-scraper [Game Thread] BYU @ Baylor (3:30PM ET) (x-post /r/CFB)
2021.10.16 20:58 CheckeredApollo [A3][NA/EU][Recruiting][New Player Friendly] 6th Bat. 1st Titan Company [Semi-Realism][16+][MARSOC]
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2021.10.16 20:58 turtlelevelslow What happened during your Sleep Paralysis episode?
2021.10.16 20:58 101rsmith I’ve been in a situationship for a year and a half. I’m starting to think my race plays a factor
So I’ve spent the better part of the last year in a situationship with a friend of mine, we’ll call her Serena [F20]. I met her in 2020 during lockdown; I had some acquaintances from college who used the time to reconnect with each other and I was invited. Serena was a regular during these video chats and over time I grew a crush for her. She’s very sweet, kind, a bit awkward and very artistic. The way I would describe her is a living Disney Princess. As time went on we moved away from the group video chats to more one on one time with each other and we’d have hours of conversation nearly everyday. For my birthday this year I went to Pennsylvania for a wedding in Philly and my friends decided to drive me to the Poconos the next day so that Serena and I could finally meet in person. Nothing too eventful, mostly window shopping and talking, but it was a highlight of my birthday vacation.
However, not everything has been perfect. Our dynamic changed after we met to the point where it was starting to feel like a relationship. Our conversations became more intimate and we become more flirtatious. While I was enjoying the progression I didn’t enjoy the ambiguity of it, I wanted to know what we were before driving ahead. I asked Serena out in July which was a painful experience. I had to wait a full week to get an answer from her which was a bit out of character for her to ghost. During which it was starting to trigger my PTSD; a few years ago I was in a one-sided/codependent relationship with a friend who’d constantly ghost me during important moments or when questions needed to be asked and would abuse me if I called her out. As I told her and my friends, my mental illness is not Serena’s fault or responsibility, but it bothers that she wouldn’t take the issue as seriously as I did.
After a week Serena told me that as wonderful and amazing as I was she wasn’t ready to date, she was still grieving her first boyfriend. Back in 2019 she got into her first relationship with her boyfriend who was 30 when she was 18. They were dating for about a year when he died that November in his sleep while they were sharing a bed. It was pretty traumatizing and it led to her developing major anxiety and the start of her abandonment issues (as of this writing Serena has had 6 deaths including her boyfriend, 2 grandparents, 2 parents of friends and a pet). I was hurt and disappointed, I told her I accepted her answer but asked for space. She kept blowing up my phone for about a week in fear that I’d cut her off until I caved in and I told her I wasn’t going to leave her.
Our relationship pretty much went back to what it was after my birthday. I did put boundaries at first to protect myself; I told Serena to stop flirting with me and commenting about my looks, which she did, but eventually we’d both slip back to flirting. A few months later we had another conflict which was me trying to to see her in person again. Serena has an irrational fear of highways to the point of anxiety attacks, so she was reluctant at best to drive to New York City so it meant I had to go up there. The problems were it cost me $100 for a round trip and there are limited buses (it’s a 2 hour trip where the first bus to leave to the Poconos was at 8am and the last bus to leave to New York City was 7pm) and I had a small window to see her. Serena would make plans with me only to cancel at the last minute. It always boiled down to her not being able to gain access to her car. Serena is the middle child in a family of 4 where everyone else’s needs superseded hers.
After the fourth time I blew up and told her to stop making plans with me that she knows she can’t follow through and give me space. Serena proceeded to blow up my phone for a day straight in tears and offering to drive to New York to see me. She even sent her friends after me for leaving her upset. I called her out and tried to explain how toxic it was that she was only giving me what I wanted when I was upset or that there’s a risk of me walking away, but she didn’t get it. All she kept saying was “this is what you wanted, I should’ve just offered that from the beginning”. I lost most of my attraction to Serena afterwards and realized that the only way this relationship would become less toxic was that I would have to make all of the changes because she is unable or unwilling to.
I didn’t want to completely cut her off because I do like her as a person and I thought it was unfair to do so just because she didn’t want to date. I’ve decided to give as much distance as I can while remaining just a friend. I only talk on the phone when I’m available, I don’t go out of my way to be available, I’ve stop flirting completely and anytime she mentions seeing me in person I tell her that needs to come see in New York first before I’d even consider making a trip to the Poconos. Meanwhile I’ve spent my free time meeting other women and gaining new relationships where I can get my needs met. Recent I’ve run into an issue with Serena involving the death of her grandmother. Her grandma died back in 2020 and this past week was the unveiling (Serena is Jewish). About 2 weeks ago she asked me to come and I offered to out of respect. There was no follow up and the unveiling was this week, and all of her friends were in attendance.
I asked Serena about it a few days ago and she said it didn’t work out, but said that I was the only person to give her constant support during this whole ordeal. That was a weird answer in my mind but I just took on face value and left it alone at the moment. It came back to me yesterday and I tried to figure out why I couldn’t be there when Serena herself asked me to be there, and then it clicked in my head; I’m Serena’s only black friend. Everyone is her life is white, my college acquaintances I met through are all Jewish. When we met in person she also met my friends and while she’s kept somewhat in contact with my 2 girl friends (one is Serbian and the other is Dominican/Colombian but white passing) she hasn’t had a single word with my 2 guy friends (both tanned skinned Puerto Ricans) since meeting them. Whenever she and her mom would would talk about my looks or ruggedness they would always compare me to Dwayne Johnson which while appreciated, I look nothing like him (my friends would say I look more like Jonathan Davis). Those compliments don’t sit with me quite as well anymore.
I am West Indian/Native American mixed and alternative/metalhead, but at the end of the day I am black. For better or worse it’s a part of my identity and something I can’t change about myself. Not to say that Serena’s grieve and trauma isn’t valid, but the idea that she might treat me differently or see as less than because of my skin grosses me out. I tried to talk to a few friends including the ones who met her and they do say that there’s a valid claim that because of how sheltered Serena is and her background of an insulated Jewish home that she may some ingrained ideals of racism that even may not be consciously aware of. Now to be fair, it could have been her extended family who would’ve given her hell for me being at the unveiling, but that still bothers me. I really want to give the benefit of the doubt but it’s starting to make too much sense. If that’s the case I’d lose what little attraction and respect I have left for Serena and would cut her off cold turkey.
TL;DR; I’ve been in a situationship with someone for a year and a half. I’m starting to believe my race may play a factor. Am I reading too much into it?
submitted by 101rsmith to dating_advice [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 20:58 The-desk-rock Black Dahlia
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2021.10.16 20:58 CarrotItchy my new friend junior 😍❤️😍
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2021.10.16 20:58 nobel-001 Table vs View materialization
Based on what criteria you decide if you will materialize your data model as table or as view in your data warehouse?
is the data warehouse provider itself considered part of the criteria? (Snowflake BigQuery, Redshift, Databricks, ...)
submitted by nobel-001 to dataengineering [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 20:58 Starstalk721 The entirety of 6th grade cheered and applauded me today at lunch, I've been there about a week as the new sub...
I'm sorry, I know this is like, my 3rd success story and there's usually more negative stuff around here, but I am just blown away by how much I love the transition I'm making from college down to 6-8.
I'm a new full-time sub this year and I was totally caught off guard by this, but apparently I've made an impact already. I've done Gym a few times and several of the 6-8 grade classes, but today during lunch duty one of the teachers said "The outside supervisor today will be Mr.Starstalk" and the 6th graders went wild cheering my name, banging on the tables and calling out while overpowering the teacher and the microphone. Took almost a full minute to calm them down so we could go outside and on the way out several came up and told me I was the "The new GOAT sub" (which apparently means Greatest Of All Time). I'll admit it was a bit hard to keep from tearing up, especially when so many kids came up to tell me how much they like when I sub (one teacher is taking some time out for a few weeks and the kids have apparently been inquiring if I could run the class).
The lunch janitor came up to me later and said she had been there many years and had never seen them react that way and asked "What exactly are you letting them get away with?". Honestly, I am a bit more lenient on them in class and study halls than others might be, but I feel that if we get the work done there is always room to be a little more relaxed. Really, I think it's my near infinite level of patience I got from my time in the Army and then teaching Drivers Education for several years.
Again, sorry to gush. But I can't keep this inside.
submitted by Starstalk721 to Teachers [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 20:58 StopExpensive Type-a day it is. Rollin and grooving baby. Yes those are fortnites.
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2021.10.16 20:58 BJBarfDick Watch out for this dude.
2021.10.16 20:58 jaajaaone My kittens sides look sunken in
2021.10.16 20:58 Robo_Alien I need help from my fellow watchers.
Okay so I’m a fanfic writer and I’m having trouble with a scene because I have watched the full show in such a long time. So let me give you guys a brief rundown of the facts and the context of the science I’m trying to write.
So my fic is set in the far far far future, I’m talking paladins resting in the pods kinda future. Anyway in my fic Keith’s pod stops working and since he can’t go back to earth he wonders the universe. Fast forward and he basically adopts this weird human looking girl that obviously not human.
Again fast forward past the backstory and to the main plot. New paladins blah blah, Keith’s so called daughter his the current red paladin. Now mind you know one knows that the girl was raised by Keith, not even the girl herself due to memory corruption reasons.
So in this fic lance takes the place of Allura as the guide for the current paladins, along with Coran and Shiro by his side. So for a certain scene I want to write, I want to have the daughter standing like in a pose or position that Keith once did in the actual series.
I’m having trouble thinking of the perfect scene to use. I need something where Keith was the center of attention and something that isn’t common.
Anyway if you could lend me some time of day and help me out I would greatly appreciate it.
submitted by Robo_Alien to Voltron [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 20:58 Arrsaild Pregunta sería sobre la orientación sexual
Si una persona mujer se realizó la operación de cambio de sexo, convirtiéndose en un hombre y le siguen atrayendo los hombres.
Que Orientación sexual tendría? Gay o heterosexual? 🧐
PD: puede ocurrir en caso contrario un hombre convertirse en mujer.
submitted by Arrsaild to preguntaReddit [link] [comments]
2021.10.16 20:58 SWAGGAFROG Damage Numbers
2021.10.16 20:58 lesak1313 Anderson for Game 2?
2021.10.16 20:58 Set_Euphoric What not to do when you are sleepy?
2021.10.16 20:58 Zewen_Senpai 幻獣姫 ハデス
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2021.10.16 20:58 suckmybols Que chingue a su madre DonDinoD
2021.10.16 20:58 Alex_Sme My psychedelic art “ice cream”
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2021.10.16 20:58 joesiah They see me rollin’ They hatin’ Patrolling and tryin’ to catch me ridin’ dirty
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2021.10.16 20:58 _XSummerRoseX_ Vale’s Royal Family [Lancaster] (@Seshirukun1)
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2021.10.16 20:58 PrussianKing1800 Idk what to do to get over her and it confuses my mind a lot
So for the past few months I have been talking to this girl who I was going to university with and over the months we have both been talking about how much we like each other and gotten very close with each other. It would go as far as her saying things such as"I really like you" to agreeing with me that she saw me as the person she wanted to be with for the rest of her life.
There would be times where she would randomly pop up to tell me how much she likes me and because of all of this I've grown on her a lot and couldn't stop thinking about her. We did say however that it was really weird how we liked each other this much purely over text and she said how she has never liked a guy before so I had some sort of magic for her to like me like this
We agreed to meetup at university Freshers as friends then see where the road took us both of us expecting either outcome but we did believe it would most likely be the same. She told me she isn't very good with her feelings and that she gets scared of the idea of relationships so we agreed that if we continued to like each other we should try a relationship but take it very slow adding in little things till she became comfortable
I told her I was prepared to sacrifice certain things if she wasn't comfortable with it i.e if she decided she didn't want cuddles I would not do cuddles and I'd be fine with that if it meant being with her.
She told me on the third day of meeting in person that she didn't like me that way and how she doesn't think making an attempt would be a good idea since she doesn't like me. I will be honest it has massively hurt me since I like her so much and grown on her based on what she had been telling me for months.
She blames herself for all this saying it's her fault for saying the stuff she did for months and that she has a misleading personality but she doesn't even remember half the stuff she has said to me
I really don't know what to do because when I'm not doing something she's all I think about.
submitted by PrussianKing1800 to Crush [link] [comments]